I have this amazing opportunity in front of me. However, taking it means giving up one of the projects on which I am currently working—which I love. In fact, I love it so much when I was approached about this other opportunity I informed them that I likely wasn’t interested.
My personal philosophy has always, but especially lately, been to be a “yes-[wo]man”. I believe this so whole-heartedly because I’m convinced that our subconscious minds are constantly working on our behalf, in a Secret-y, Law of Attraction-esque way we are searching for the answers—and solutions—to our souls biggest dreams.
In doing that we are drawn to those solutions even though they don’t always present themselves as solutions. In fact, sometimes they present to us as problems, inconveniences and nuisances. Because of this trickery, I have a personal policy to always say ‘yes’.
(Note: I realize there are some people that can’t say ‘no’ and so they become pushovers bombarded and bogged-down with ‘yeses’, and while that is a problem, I think saying ‘no’ too frequently is a greater epidemic. In the case of the aforementioned, time-management, setting boundaries, and understanding that guilt is poison are the oft real issues but that’s a post for another day.)
So, because of my Policy of Yes, I was very upfront with my suitors that I am always open to having a conversation but that I wasn’t sure that I could take on both projects with adequate attention, therefore, I may not be the right person for them. If, on that basis, they wanted to continue the conversation, I would be delighted.
And the conversation was had.
I was actually very intrigued. And because of some other factors in my life, it actually makes more sense than I would have given credence to two months earlier. Oh, and I’d be damn good at it.
However, I kept finding myself wallowing in this pit of sadness. Feeling like if I changed directions I failed. And if I stayed put I was shooting myself in the foot—the proverbial damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don’t.
But then something dawned on me. The other side of the damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don’t coin is blessed-if-you-do, blessed-if-you-don’t. For the first time on this particular journey and maybe in my life, I realized that I really do win either way. This is literally—and I don’t use the word ‘literally’ lightly—a win-win!
I am still scared. Believe me. It’s scary but if we are not scared, we aren’t growing. And if we aren’t growing we aren’t helping ourselves or those around us. See, we need to be evolving, improving, enriching in order to help others do the same. Stagnation is death (think: bed sores, the slowest zebra in the pack, moss overtaking the pond—sorry for the imagery, I suppose I could have just said ‘literally’).
If you aren’t scared, you are comfortable; and comfortable people are rarely at the top, living their dream.
Upon this realization, I felt a huge sense of peace wash over me. In finding peace we are free to try our hardest and know it still might not work out but that we are better for the effort, improved for having the opportunity.
And if we win, what a blessing.
How are you blessed-if-you-do, blessed-if-you-don’t? Are you ready to be a ‘yes-[wo]man’?
Marjorie Dudley 